The new me..

Hello everyone! This is my second blog. Its for a short story, essay writing, poems and so on. I made this because it can't fit in my first blog. Anyway, there's a lot of things depressed me nowadays. And, my current status now is single. Yeah, people shocked! They can't even take it nor believe it. Sigh =(. You know what, Everything happens for a reason. There are no regrets in life, Just lessons. I'm still young, maybe i can't understand and follow your way, you've grown up. At this age, I want to take my rare opportunity to fix the past. I will try my very best. I won't let myself fall. Because I know where it'll end and I am afraid to experience it again. It gave me pains..A terrible pain. I'm so sick begging for forgiveness, begging you to understand me, how was my life. I don't want people call me liar, I am not. I've wish someone understand me before, but suddenly I realized, no use for that. It is way too much better if I treasure my  own life. Only God know how was my feeling, I don't like to show it at all. So, where should I begin. Hmmm. I am the only daughter. I live with my mom, my mom's family. I love my mom very much but I love Jesus more than that. When I'm in despair, I used to cry, I pray. I didn't tell my mom. I'd rather suffering-in-silence because I don't want to give a burden to the people around me, mostly my family. I don't give a fuck. Well now, it hurts me more. Since she got her own mate, she begins to walk far away from me. I started to be lonely. I got nothing in this world accept her. Now, she has someone in her heart. Well, I guess, the people might be special to her. Hey, do you ever know how it feels when someone who used to care and love you like the way it is but it is not going to be happen? Oh God, how jerk am I? I begin to love writing since a long time ago, I like to write how was my feeling. I am not bull-crapping around. I write from my deep heart.